Friday, April 08, 2005

a new old friend..

It's been long since I blogged had too many things to take care of, I quit my job in Hyderabad and joined a company which got me shipped to New Jersey, anyone who knows what's been happening in my life would know why I joined them. Many people asked me to re-think about my decision but I knew what I was doing and why. I have no liking for my current place or the work apart from the fact that they are pretty decent folks, I joined them for totally other reasons which cannot be termed as professional. I joined them because I wanted to be close to Chhavi, we were (were? I for sure am still just as much in love with her and I hope it's same with her too) madly in love with each other and the best thing was that we were not just blindly in love but would see fault in each other too and try to learn from one another. I have never in my life felt the same sort of comfort while talking to anyone else even the ones who were very close to me. we would talk for hours everyday and still feel like talking more...we would be with each other over the weekends (every weekend except 2 out of the 12 weeks that I stayed there) when I was in Louisville and still feel like being with each other every day. I have never met a person who was so much giving, so caring & still being so receptive to new thoughts/ideas (I know these qualities are pretty much still in her) as her, circumstances or twist of fate or whatever else it was (I don't blame her for anything) we stopped talking and according to her she moved on with her life and that's what she told me even after 10 months since the date we stopped talking. So why am I still trying when it's been more than 10 months? why am I still hoping that we would be together back to same old days when perhaps everyone else would have written us off? am I being impractical? or am I being overly hopeful? I don't know yet what is the right thing to do but I would do just anything to have her back in my life. I don't want her to come back just for my sake but because she also hopefully feels the same way. ..
I am,
You are.
& nothing else matters
in our private universe!
I am waiting for the day and I would see her smiling at me again & waiting with open arms..is it too much to ask for?
I will end this blog with my favorite lines from Ghalib (chubby also loves it): -
hazaron khwaishen aisi,
ki har khwaish pe dum nikle.
bahut nikle mere armaan,
lekin fir bhi kam nikle.

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